The past couple weeks it seems like life has been in a whirl and I can’t seem to catch up. But then, how boring would life be if it were always the same.
Some of you who have been readers for a while know about the struggles of my husband, Ron, and I trying to adopt our two granddaughters. We were denied the youngest, Kae-Lee, and she was adopted by her foster care parents almost a year ago. We were still hoping to get Kiley, who is seven and severely handicapped, but we recently received the denial that they are giving her to complete strangers who live in northern Michigan, ironically in the very area where Ron’s parents retired to and we have spent a lot of time. That adoption will most likely go through in the near future. I did put in a call to the attorney that was trying to help us before to see what the retainer would be and what she thinks the chances are of winning a Section 45 hearing, but I already know from reading numerous appeals decisions that it is very hard to win.
What is very frustrating is CPS/DHS denied us contact with the girls, both before and after the termination of parental rights. Then when Michigan Children’s Institute wanted us to have supervised visits for MCI to make a final adoption decision, DHS fought against that as well and the judge ruled against us getting the visits. So what is one of the reasons we are being denied? Lack of contact for over three years — and yet they are giving her to a complete stranger.
When the adoption agency wrote their recommendation that we adopt, they recommended we get only the older one, not the younger. Why? Because the younger had been with the foster care family from the time she was an infant and they wanted to adopt. As for Kiley, they said she should be adopted into a family as the only child — but they are awarding her to a family that has other handicapped children in it.
Their third reason was that we do not have experience in caring for a child with severe handicaps requiring 24-hour care. The time we spent caring for her prior to being kidnapped by CPS apparently doesn’t count. That’s okay, because I had started a book about this situation and was taking my time to see what the outcome would be. Now that I know, I can delve into my writing more intensely and obviously will have a lot of time for promotion of the book once published.
I know we are not the only family this has happened to. Kidnapping by Child Protective Services/Department of Human Services is a nationwide problem, no family is safe. Removal of children from loving homes, placing them in foster care and then giving priority to non-family members, rather than biological relatives, has been going on for at least 15-20 years and needs to be stopped.
If you were not reading my blog at the time I wrote in more detail about our situation you can check it out at Attempted Adoption. I would love to hear from others who have had experiences with this type of situation, good or bad.