One day I was flipping through Facebook posts when a friend commented “So I am sitting on my deck reading and enjoying a glass of vino when a frickin’ squirrel drops a frickin’ acorn directly into my glass! Really Mr. Squirrel! I could not do that if I tried!”
Now, I am not the type of person who can let this type of comment pass, it just gets the mind rolling on the possibilities on how this story could have progressed……
What if Carol had picked up the acorn after it was nicely wine soaked and thrown it back at the squirrel? Would the squirrel have discarded it as “damaged” goods, not worthy of storage? Would it have taken the acorn into its mouth and carried it back to store? Would it have held the acorn, licking the wine off it?
If the squirrel carried the nut in its mouth or licked it clean, would the wine have inebriated the squirrel. Would Carol have then been entertained by a drunk squirrel staggering about on her lawn? What if the drunken squirrel climbed the tree for more acorns and in its drunken state staggered a cross a limb and fell out of the tree and into her class of wine?
What would the mental state of a drunken squirrel be, especially after falling from the tree and into the glass of wine? Would it have been a friendly, happy drunk or an angry, hostile squirrel?
My thought is, the next time Carol is sitting under a tree drinking a glass of wine, she should keep on hand extra treats in case an angry, drunken squirrel lands in her wine glass. Let’s face it, most wild animals turn happier when fed. Maybe a bowl of wine for its drinking pleasure would be a good idea.