Tag Archives: angry

Acorn Drop = Drunken Squirrel

One day I was flipping through Facebook posts when a friend commented “So I am sitting on my deck reading and enjoying a glass of vino when a frickin’ squirrel drops a frickin’ acorn directly into my glass! Really Mr. Squirrel! I could not do that if I tried!”

Now, I am not the type of person who can let this type of comment pass, it just gets the mind rolling on the possibilities on how this story could have progressed……

What if Carol had picked up the acorn after it was nicely wine soaked and thrown it back at the squirrel?  Would the squirrel have discarded it as “damaged” goods, not worthy of storage?  Would it have taken the acorn into its mouth and carried it back to store?  Would it have held the acorn, licking the wine off it?  index

If the squirrel carried the nut in its mouth or licked it clean, would the wine have inebriated the squirrel.  Would Carol have then been entertained by a drunk squirrel staggering about on her lawn?  What if the drunken squirrel climbed the tree for more acorns and in its drunken state staggered a cross a limb and fell out of the tree and into her class of wine?

What would the mental state of a drunken squirrel be, especially after falling from the tree and into the glass of wine?  Would it have been a friendly, happy drunk or an angry, hostile squirrel?

My thought is, the next time Carol is sitting under a tree drinking a glass of wine, she should keep on hand extra treats in case an angry, drunken squirrel lands in her wine glass.  Let’s face it, most wild animals turn happier when fed.  Maybe a bowl of wine for its drinking pleasure would be a good idea.

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Filed under backyard, decisions, Discoveries, food, Life is a Melting Pot, Meals, nature, nutrician, spring, summer

Swearing at Your Deceased Husband is Okay

It has been seven months since my husband passed away and I am handling it very well, except for those times when I get frustrated and swear at him.  But that’s okay.  Keep in mind if anyone else did it I would probably kill them, at least verbally.  I lived with him for 34 years, I have exclusive rights.

Only someone who has ever lost a spouse can understand the roller coaster of emotions you deal with.  People will say they understand because they have lost a grandparent, parent, aunt, uncle, child, etc.  They may feel sympathy for you, but they can’t understand fully.  Losing a spouse is different.

EPSON MFP image

Ron and I approx. 1980

So why am I swearing at him?  Because it keeps me emotionally on track.  Because it relieves frustration.  Because it helps with mourning at unexpected moments.  Because it is my exclusive right and I sometimes utilize it as an emotionally stabilizing crutch to help me maintain focus.

What am I swearing at him about?  That depends on what I am doing at the time.  As I am riding the lawn mower around our backyard that has numerous things to go around, and then a tremendous amount of edging I have said on numerous occasions “dammit Ron, all I can say is I know you designed this thinking you were going to be taking care of it, not me.”    It helps me to focus on what needs to be done and set goals for getting the yard in order.   It helps me to remember that he never had any intention of me having to handle the yard work.  That was his area.

When I’m going through things he purchased at garage sales, estate sales, or scrapping and I look at the price tags on some of the items I say “dammit Ron, I hope you didn’t pay that price for this.” and “dammit Ron, why did you spend so much money on this stuff.”  I could have used the money more than the stuff, but I know he had a goal in mind of reselling those things in a booth at the Eastern Market (huge farmer’s market in Detroit) or at flea markets and that was his goal.  Everyone needs goals, and he had good intentions before the cancer took them and him.

EPSON MFP image

Ron and I October 2015

I could go on, but I think you get the point.  The biggest one though, is the one that is most important.  You see in addition to a huge accumulation of stuff I need to get rid of, my house is full of Ron…photos he took, photos of him, things that we did, things that we purchased…memories.  So, when something hits me and I’m having an emotional moment, I put my fingers on his chest/body on one of those photos and say “dammit Ron, why did you have to die?”

So now you now why it is okay to swear at your deceased husband.  As his surviving widow  you have the exclusive right to verbalize your frustrations at your new life, at the things you must now tackle, at the emotions that go along with the grieving process, at the frustrations over their death.  It is your exclusive right.  Enjoy it and use it to the fullest.  Your sanity depends on it.

 

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Filed under cancer, Coping, death, Life Changing, Life is a Melting Pot, marriage, memoir